Matthew BaileyDisclaimer: The review below contains a few adult themes but is intended to be informative and in no way offensive.
So… I’ve been sitting on this review for almost three months, continuously debating whether or not to post it, largely because it probably doesn’t paint me as the best parent (and yes, this might even top the time Toby ended up wearing a blindfold from a promo for the film “Showgirls” just to play Team 3).
We’ve reviewed several Heldberg games over the past year or so, and for the most part, they’ve been excellent. I especially recommend “Catch the Wave,” which we hailed as one of our favourite memory games in our review last year.
Some of the content in their games has been fairly crude, but they’ve always been fun and harmless. So, with this being the fifth or sixth one I’ve played, I had no reason to suspect that this would be any different.
I set out with some trepidation but also hopefulness for something a bit gross but silly when Jack and I sat down after Cubs one evening to play “Tokyo Poo Divers.” Normally, when I play a longer game with the kids, I try it out solo first, mainly to get an idea of what’s going on. In this case, because it’s relatively simple and I was only playing with Jack, we decided to dive right in….
BAD IDEA
As a fairly liberal parent, I found the concept of divers exploring the poo-filled sewers of Tokyo for treasure quite amusing. And let’s face it, most nearly 9-year-old boys find poo funny.
What I didn’t realize, entirely my fault, is that a handful of the “treasures” that can be dug up include adult toys and drug paraphernalia. This became apparent when Jack turned over a card, which luckily I managed to explain away as a unicorn headband. At this point, I probably should have cut my losses and abandoned the game, but as a parent, you find yourself in that situation where you don’t want to draw too much attention to it, hoping it’s just an isolated incident. Needless to say, after I had explained away a crab claw, an ornate glass vase, and a big plaster, the game was over, and I think I just about got away with it.
So yes, the content in “Tokyo Poo Divers” is 100% not suitable for children and, to be honest, likely not suitable for even some sensitive adults.
Ignoring the fact that I can’t recommend this game due to its content, let’s talk about how it plays.
You start by laying out an eight-by-eight grid and choosing who goes first. You randomly flip over a tile to see what you get. If you get a cross, your go is over; if you get a z, essentially you were snoozing on the drop, and you get to flip over another one. If you find an object, you then have the chance of trying to cascade these by flipping over another next to it. If you find another treasure, this multiplies the score of the previous one, allowing you to cascade and get some fairly high scores. Of course, you can gamble and end up losing everything.
And that’s the game, to be honest. Completely ignoring my stress over the inappropriate content, the game itself isn’t very good. It’s pretty much 100% luck, and while there are push-your-luck elements, they aren’t very compelling. It only takes one lucky turn to get considerably far ahead of your opponent. Even if the subject matter had been suitable, this would have ended up in the unlikely-to-play pile, best-case scenario.
The components are the usual Heldberg Games quality, with everything made from brown paper and card, and the artwork screen-printed on the front.
Don’t buy “Tokyo Poo Divers.” If you’re interested in Heldberg Games as a company, I would 100% recommend “Catch the Wave,” which is an excellent game. But this one is not worth it for, as you can see, for multiple reasons.
